


I’m In Love (With You)

by seekrest



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: (and so do I), Angst with a Happy Ending, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Infertility/Miscarriage, Marvel said PeterMJ rights!, Michelle Jones Needs a Hug, Not Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Peter Parker Has a Family, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Peter Parker is a Good Dad, Post-Spider-Man: Far From Home, a love story for the ages
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-07
Updated: 2019-10-07
Packaged: 2020-11-27 04:03:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20941967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seekrest/pseuds/seekrest
Summary: Being with Peter didn’t twist her stomach into knots, didn’t give her butterflies or whatever else she’d see on those cheesy romance movies May liked to watch.Being with him felt more like wearing an old sweatshirt, like sinking into her side of the couch after a long day.Comfortable. Quiet. Easy.Michelle loved Peter Parker.And she knew that Peter Parker loved her back.





	I’m In Love (With You)

**Author's Note:**

> First, a MASSIVE thank you to [blondsak](https://archiveofourown.org/users/blondsak) for reading over this monster of a one-shot. You’re a queen and I don’t deserve you.
> 
> Second, the lyrics interspersed are from[ “I’m In Love With You” by Joy Williams ](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=jI78RE-TZNY), the sweetest song about marriage and domestic bliss I‘ve ever heard.
> 
> Peter and MJ are soulmates and I will never stop screaming about them. 
> 
> <3

* * *

_  
I’ve been waiting all my life for this morning, _

_ Just to wake up next to you, holding me. _

_ And your head is resting gently on my shoulder, _

_ Like you’re whispering to me. _

_ “I’m in love with you.”_

_”I’m in love with you.”_

_So glad I found you,_

_I’m in love with you._

* * *

It was hot. 

Michelle has tossed and turned for the past five minutes, kicking every blanket and sheet off of her and yet still feeling as if her skin was on fire. 

It didn’t help that Peter - blissfully snoring away beside her - seemed to just _ radiate _ with heat. 

When they first started dating, he had mentioned that he had a thing with cold weather. Something about spiders and thermoregulation or whatever. It was never really an issue since Tony had put heaters in his suit and May had hammered into him the importance of keeping himself wrapped up at the slightest chance of a chill. 

Michelle turns to him, squinting at him before her face relaxed into a soft smile. 

It didn’t make sense for the inverse to happen, for Peter to not only be at risk for hypothermia the minute the temperature dropped below forty but for him to _ also _ seemingly absorb hot temperatures like her own portable heater. 

She should’ve anticipated it really, Peter had never failed to surprise her. 

Then again, she thinks - that’s what Michelle gets for choosing a beach destination for their honeymoon. 

Peter moves a little in his sleep, mouth open. As his snores fill up the room, Michelle just smirks and slides in a little closer. 

The heat was unbearable, Michelle almost regretting the decision to move closer to him.

But even now - six years of dating, a year engagement and exactly twenty two hours after marrying him - Michelle knew that she’d never be good about staying away from her dumbass nerd.

Peter’s face scrunched up as she moved closer to him, one eye half sliding open. 

“Wha—“

“Go back to sleep, Pete.”

“You okay?” Michelle nods, the smile deepening. 

Michelle had never been the type to imagine her wedding, honeymoon - really anything romantic. Her parents had been in stupid love since they were fourteen, something she’d always admired even if she didn’t quite believe in it herself.

Then at fifteen, she took notice of Peter Parker. At sixteen, he started to notice her. 

And they’d been inseparable ever since. 

Being with Peter didn’t twist her stomach into knots, didn’t give her butterflies or whatever else bullshit she’d see on those cheesy romance movies May liked to watch.

Being with him felt more like wearing an old sweatshirt, like sinking into her side of the couch after a long day. 

Comfortable. Quiet. Easy.

Michelle had never been much of a romantic, but watching him as he slept - the eye half-open slowly closing - she wondered if maybe those stupid movies weren’t completely wrong.

Peter Parker was the smartest person she’s ever met, knowing Tony - a genius - would agree with her. He was a dumbass, stupid to a fault.

But he was also the love of her life. Knew what made her tick, what made her laugh, how to help her when she cried.

He knew what words to say to make any day brighter. Knew when there didn’t need to be any words spoken at all. Peter knew how to push her buttons, how to aggravate her like no one else could. 

He knew how to make her scream his name, how to make her toes curl and her back arch, how to use his mouth in ways that if she could, would've made her sixteen-year old self blush.

He knew how she liked her coffee, how she liked having control of the tv remote, what blanket was her favorite and which sweater of his that she hated.

Peter knew her better than she thinks she knew herself. And Michelle knows that Peter would think the same about her. 

Michelle was happy - happier than she’s ever been, happier than she thinks she’ll ever be. 

Happy that she married him - even if his body heat threatened to melt her skin.

“Yeah, I just.. I love you.”

Peter hums in response. A beat, before his head snaps up, eyes blearily looking back at her. 

“You what?”

“Shove it, Parker.” Michelle says, burrowing into his chest. 

It’s miserably hot now. Michelle thinks she must be a masochist as this point. 

But as Peter smiles, playing with the ends of her hair as his arms slowly enclosed around her, Michelle suddenly decides she really doesn’t care.

She loved Peter Parker. She’d loved him since she was seventeen years old, she was convinced she would love him forever. 

“Aw babe,” he whispers, Michelle knowing he was seconds away from drifting right back to sleep, “You love me.”

“We’re married, Peter.”

“Still.” 

* * *

_ When we’re leaving dreams and rolling back the covers, _

_ All at once we’re getting ready for the day. _

_ It’s when you look at me in the mirror while you’re shaving, _

_ Before I go on my way. _

_ You say,_

_ “I’m in love with you.”_

* * *

“Don’t think those brown eyes can fool me. I know when you’re hiding something, Peter.”

Peter smirks, winking as he walks up beside her.

“And what,” Peter comes up behind her, arms traveling around her waist as he whispered into her ear, “would ever give you the impression that I’m hiding something?” 

He leaves a soft kiss on her cheek, Michelle sighing as she leaned away from him - giving room for him to begin to leave a trail of kisses down her neck, moving down to her exposed shoulder blade.

“I think,” Michelle closes her eyes, smiling as Peter continued to kiss her, his hands traveling down the length of her stomach, “that you need to get to work.” 

Peter doesn’t move. She turns her head, bringing his head back up to kiss her before she turns, tweaking his side.

“Ow.” 

“I know you’re thinking of leaving SI.”

Peter pauses, eyes dancing around her face - trying to gauge her reaction.

“And… you’re okay with that?”

Michelle rolled her eyes, turning away from him and back to the sink, moving so that he could come up beside her. “Of course, Peter. I just want to know why you didn’t tell me.”

Peter bites his lip, Michelle watching him out of the corner of her eye as she started to put on her mascara. He says nothing as he starts to run the water, grabbing his razor. 

Michelle waits, knowing that whatever reason he has - he’ll tell her.

“I just… I don’t know. Tony said it’s okay, that he expected me to pick up and leave him someday but that’s not it.” Peter sighs again, getting to work on his barely there stubble.

“I feel like there’s more that I should be doing. More that I _ could _ do than just to work at SI for the rest of my life.” Peter pauses before continuing.

“Like there’s more people I could be helping.”

“You act like you’re a bum tied down to a soul-sucking corporate job, Peter.” Michelle joked, seeing Peter smile as she put her mascara away.

“You work in a department and for a company that creates state of the art medical technology, your web sealant is used in hospitals all over New York, and it’s just a matter of time before the patent goes through and it can launch nationwide. You’re _ Spider-Man _ , Pete. You’ve done more for this city, hell the _ universe _, in the past few years than some people do in their entire lives.”

Peter listens, Michelle’s eyebrows furrowing.

“Unless… it’s not enough?”

Peter shakes his head, rinsing the razor underneath the faucet. “I know, I know, I sound like a jackass. Like ‘look at me, there’s not _ enough _great things I can do!’” 

Michelle studies him for a second before coming up behind him, a mirror image of how’d approached her before - resting her chin on his shoulder.

“You sound like you’re putting too much pressure on yourself. Thinking more about what you _ should _ do rather than what you _ want _ to.” Peter puts the razor down, resting his hands on the sink as Michelle kisses his cheek.

“What do you _ want _ to do, Peter?”

Peter doesn’t answer, choosing instead to whirl them around until Michelle is lifted - sitting on the edge of the sink counter, Peter filling the space between her legs. She’d be more thrown off if she wasn’t so used to this, a year into their marriage and Peter still looking at her the same way he did on their wedding night - the same way he had looked at her since their first date.

Like he wanted her, could never get enough of her - and wanted to show her every way he could.

“What I want,” Peter’s voice was rough, whispering into her ear as Michelle sighed, his hands running over her thighs, “is to spend the day with you. You think you can play hooky?” 

Michelle brings his lips to hers, wrapping her legs around him he pulled her closer. Michelle feels almost dizzy, kissing Peter feeling new and like coming home all at the same time. Their mouths move in sync with each other, Michelle remembering all their fumbling and second-guessing when they were younger.

They’d come along way since then, Michelle knowing his body just as well as he did hers. 

But before it can go any further, even as she feels him harden against her, Michelle brings her hands up to his chest - pushing him back even as Peter sighs.

“If I play _ hooky _ again this week, we won’t have enough to make rent. And since you’re having a mid-life crisis, someone’s gotta pay the bills around here.”

Peter groans, out of frustration or annoyance Michelle doesn’t know. “I’m not having a _ crisis _, just…”

“I’m kidding, Pete.” Michelle grins as Peter sighs again, her eyes shifting downward.

“Though it looks like I’ll be a little late today.”

Peter looks up at her with a curious expression on his face as she jumps off the counter. 

“Because…?”

“Because even though I don’t have the big life answers for you, Pete, you know, we don’t have to figure it out today. But we’ll figure it out. We always do.” Michelle leaned in, kissing him softly. 

“Until then though, I _ can _ help you with this.” She smiles once more, Peter’s eyes widening before they start to close, bracing himself against the sink as he sighs, Michelle sinking down to her knees.

* * *

_ I’m in love with you. _

_ I’m in love with you. _

_You’re the one I choose._

_ Cause I’m in love. _

* * *

“Peter, you have to wait thirty seconds.”

“It’s _ been _ thirty seconds.”

“It’s been more like ten. Fifteen now. Seriously, you’re going to make me vomit with how much you keep pacing.”

Peter smirks, winking at her. “That’s a good sign right? Morning sickness?”

Michelle frowns in disgust, throwing a pillow at him. “How the hell is morning sickness a _ good _ thing, Peter. I’ve changed my mind, I’m not having kids with you.”

Peter laughs, a sloppy apologetic kiss before he sits down beside her, tapping his fingers against his knee. Michelle rests her hand on his, smiling.

“We might have a baby.”

Peter nods, excitedly even as Michelle can see some tension behind his eyes.

“Yeah. But if not, you know, making it’s the fun part.”

His words are joking but there’s an edge to his tone, Michelle’s grip on his hand tightening.

It’s been almost eight months - eight months of trying, eight months of counting and testing, eight months of sex feeling more and more like an experiment. 

Michelle knows that eight months - in the grand scheme of things - was nothing, knowing that it could take years for them to have a baby before anything could be considered “wrong.”

But it still bothered her, the idea that she couldn’t seem to get pregnant - and she knew it had bothered Peter, fearing that he couldn’t get her pregnant.

Everything was fine, the doctor had said as much. Just a matter of timing. 

And it was the perfect timing.

Peter had moved to a different department in SI, working more in a teaching role - creating an actual internship that focused on kids with potential but limited means, something Tony and Pepper had supported wholeheartedly.

It gave him free time, even with Spider-Man - and something he had organized specifically so he would have time to stay at home with a baby.

“Why do moms get to have all the fun anyway?” He had quipped, winking during one of their first conversations about it. 

But now on their eight month of actively trying, almost a year after they’d talked about it - Michelle was impatient, wanting to finally see the two little pink lines she’d spend her days daydreaming about. 

She hadn’t ever thought about kids much when she was young, liking the idea in the abstract but never really seeing herself taking the plunge. 

But then she met Peter, fell in love with him, married him, and it was while kids in the abstract were still interesting - the reality of having kids _ with Peter _ was something she hadn't realized how much she wanted.

But she did. She wanted kids, wanted them with Peter.

Peter jumps up from their place on the bed, going to the dresser. He grabs the stick, Michelle waiting as he looked it - knowing it was his turn to break the news. She hated that they took turns, hated that they’d developed enough of a routine - enough of a script - to know what to expect.

That Peter would turn to her and tell her that he loved her. That Peter would kiss her and say it was okay, that they’ll try again next month. That Peter would try and hold back the tears as Michelle cried, knowing that the minute he left the apartment he’d break down, having once overheard a conversation he had with Tony.

Peter was selfless and good and would be such a good dad. And Michelle liked to think that maybe, she’d be a good mom.

But as Peter turns to face her, an unreadable expression on his face - Michelle braces herself for another round of this, another month of disappointment.

It surprises her then when he breaks out into a smile, the tears streaming down his face as he kneels down in front of her.

Michelle inhales sharply as Peter beams, taking her hand into his.

“Are we—am I—“

“We’re gonna have a baby.” 

Michelle laughs, before putting a hand to her mouth before saying, “Are you sure?”

Peter nods, excitedly this time as the tears fall down his face. “Yeah, yeah look.” Michelle does, seeing the tell tale two lines. 

Two lines. Something she’s dreamed about for months, finally come true. 

Michelle feels the tears forming in her own eyes, bringing her hand to Peter’s face as he rushes forward, kissing her. She leans into it, both of them laughing and crying before he hugs her, Michelle burrowing her head into his neck.

“See? Told you it was morning sickness.” 

Michelle grins, hugging Peter tighter as he laughs.

It might’ve taken longer than she had anticipated. There were still doctors appointments and furniture and maternity leave to sort through - but it was all problems Michelle looked forward to solving. 

Michelle sent out a thank you to the universe, that for once - her and Peter could have everything they wanted.

* * *

_ Love is joy and love is pain. _

* * *

Michelle heard the door close but didn’t move, laying still as she faced the wall of their room.

She heard the footsteps, felt the soft pressure of someone sitting down on the bed. 

But it wasn’t until the gentle fingers pushed back some of her hair, a motherly gesture if there ever was one - that Michelle started to cry.

“Oh MJ.”

Michelle sobbed, her pillow still stained with tears as Pepper leaned over, rubbing her shoulders - holding her tight.

She’d been nine weeks pregnant when they’d arrived at the cabin, excited and ready to share the news. 

Peter had been so excited, Michelle too - almost giddy with anticipation at their plan to share it the morning after they’d arrived - a hokey, dumb plan that involved “world’s best grandma and grandpa” coffee mugs and t-shirts, a plan for Morgan to video tape the whole thing.

It was cheesy, silly to a fault but Michelle hadn’t cared. She wanted to do it, wanted to lean into it - knowing that the joy on Pepper and Tony’s face would barely contain a fraction of the happiness she felt. 

But then she’d woken up in the middle of the night with a start, stomach cramping and a sense of dread building before she had even turned over the covers - waking Peter and everyone else with her screams.

Pepper leaned in closer as Michelle’s sobs grew louder. 

She wasn’t pregnant anymore.

Pepper began to murmur soft and comforting things to her. Michelle doesn’t register what they are, crying more at the gentleness of her tone and touch - mourning something she had wanted so badly to become and yet felt as if she would never have. 

It was horrifying - the pain of what she and Peter had lost before they’d even had the chance to have it - gone before they’d even had the chance to name their child.

It hits Michelle then, that they hadn’t even had the chance to learn whether the baby was a boy or a girl.

A new wave of grief hovers over Michelle, her whole body shaking with the depth of their loss. 

Peter was somewhere else in the cabin. He’d held her all night, whispered to her just as Pepper was now doing as she cried. She’d told him to go and eat something, knowing he had to be starving but also knowing that for as much as he comforted her, that he was also holding back his own grief.

That he’d lost a baby too.

She can only guess that since Pepper’s with her that Tony is with him, consoling him with words and with a touch that only a parent can give.

The thought of that - and of the fear that a parent is something that she could never be - shatters Michelle, Pepper’s words falling onto deaf ears.

She’s not sure how long Pepper stays with her or when Peter finally returns.

All Michelle knows is the loss in front of her, the deep well of love she had felt for someone who didn’t even have a name - and who now was already gone.

* * *

_ It’s kissing in the rain. _

* * *

“Don’t you dare start with me, Peter.”

Peter winked, holding her closer as they huddled under the bodega’s awning. 

“I’m sorry, who was the one who said we didn’t need an umbrella?”

Michelle rolls her eyes, the water already seeping into her shoes. She’d been stubborn about it, Peter had a sixth sense for these kind of things.

Not his spider-sense, or Peter Tingle as May had called it much to Peter’s mortification and Michelle’s absolute delight - but an honest sense for the _ weather _. 

Tony hypothesized that it was something else that was a part of his spider DNA, him and Rhodey ribbing on Peter that he was more insect than human - which again would make Michelle laugh at Peter’s annoyance, arguing for the countless time that spiders are arachnids.

Michelle knew Tony and Rhodey were joking with him, as Peter surely did too. But it was nice to hear it anyway, a comfortable and easy part of their lives together - something Michelle was glad for.

They had been on their way to Michelle’s parents for dinner when Peter had stopped on the way out, arguing that they needed an umbrella.

Michelle said no. Peter argued that they did.

Michelle had won. But as she shivered, about to suck down her pride and apologize, Peter just holding her even closer - her eyes find something else, her back straightening. 

Peter immediately looks at her in alarm, Michelle seeing from the corner of her eyes that he was searching her face, trying to figure out what had caused her to tense so suddenly when his own senses hadn’t told him anything. 

But then he follows her line of sight, Michelle hearing his sharp inhale as she continues to stare. 

It’s a little girl, no more than three years old, with brown curly hair and dressed in the most obnoxiously yellow rain jacket that she’s ever seen. She’s hand in hand with who Michelle can only assume is her mom, stepping on puddles and giggling - a laughter that rattles Michelle’s insides for how pure and innocent it sounds. 

It’s silly, Michelle thinks. Their baby would barely have been a month old, far too young for rain jackets and late night giggles and walks down the street. But the sight of the little girl, another peal of laughter ringing through the air as she found another puddle, is too much for Michelle, feeling a sob in the back of her throat as Peter grips her tighter.

“MJ.” She hears Peter but can’t bring herself to look at him, eyes transfixed as the duo walks up to them, the little girl smiling up at her. 

The girl waves with her free hand, Michelle seeing her mom smile at the two of them before continuing, the little girl looking back to Michelle as she stared. 

Peter’s arm around her pulls her even closer, twisting her around so that she can look at him. 

When she does, Michelle sees it - the grief that aches in the pit of her stomach, threatening to swallow her whole - mirrored perfectly in Peter’s brown eyes. Michelle can’t bring herself to say anything, just closing her eyes as she leans into Peter’s chest - knowing that he understood, without ever needing to say a thing.

They stand there for a moment, the rain continuing to pour around them before Peter leans back - Michelle seeing the tears in his eyes as he offers her a small smile. Michelle returns it, Peter moving forward and softly pressing his lips to her forehead - a kiss that held meaning in everything it didn’t say. 

They’d lost their child. 

But they had each other. 

And for now - maybe for always - Michelle thinks that that would be okay.

* * *

_ It’s doing dishes when its late, isn’t it baby? _

* * *

Michelle tilted her head to the side, leaning her hand up on the couch as she watched him. Peter was chattering about something that had happened with one of the interns at work, motioning with his hands as he always did when he was excited - reminding Michelle of how he used to be when they were teenagers. 

It was a reminder of how long she had loved Peter Parker, a reminder of how much they had been through. And yet staring at him, the smile on her face widening as she watched him - Michelle thought of all the things they’d still have yet to live. 

She’d taken the test four times, took a fifth one at home just to be sure. 

But she knew, in a way that she couldn’t explain, even without a test —

She was pregnant. 

Michelle had debated for days for how to tell Peter, guessing that she was about ten weeks along. She didn’t know for sure and a part of her told her to wait, a fear in the back of her mind that it was too soon to tell - thinking that she had just barely passed the threshold from before. 

But watching Peter, seeing the way he flung water everywhere as he finished their dishes just made her laugh. 

She couldn’t keep something like this from him. 

Peter turned to her, wiping his hand with the towel from the sink - his own face breaking out into a smile at seeing hers. 

“What?” 

“Nothing.”

“No, there’s something going on. You have that look on your face.” Michelle rolled her eyes. 

“Why does something have to be going on? Can’t I just _ admire _ my husband while he does the dishes?” 

Peter smirks, laughing as he sets the towel down and walks towards her - hovering over her on the couch until she kisses him. 

“You can admire me later, I got to figure out what’s wrong with the radiator.” Michelle almost snorts as he leans away from her, shaking his head. 

“The radiator? Why the hell are you bothering with that?” 

Peter shrugs, kissing her once more before going to stand. “I don’t know, there’s some kind of buzzing sound I keep hearing. Like a--” Peter motions with his fingers, tapping gently but quickly, “I don’t know. You don’t hear it?”

Michelle blinks, shaking her head. “How the hell do you think I’d hear something like that? What are you talking about, there’s nothing wrong with our--” 

And then she stops, the realization dawning on her - Peter just looking at her in confusion. 

“What?”

Michelle lets out a sharp laugh, before sobering - thinking that there will never be a day when she isn’t completely amazed at how wildly overwhelming her life with Peter Parker is. 

Peter just looks at her dumbfounded, the expression on his face making Michelle laugh again. 

If she had any doubt that she was pregnant, if the five tests she’d taken hadn’t been enough - this was all the confirmation she needed. 

Because Peter, still looking at her as if she’s grown a third head as she continues to laugh - harder and harder as the seconds pass - wasn’t hearing something wrong with the radiator.

Michelle knew - in a way she couldn’t explain - that he was hearing the baby’s heartbeat. 

Michelle tries to compose herself, reaching out for Peter’s hand. He takes it, still looking at her curiously as he goes to sit next to her.

“MJ? You okay?” 

Michelle laughs once more, wiping away a tear - from the laughter, from joy, Michelle doesn’t know - before smiling. 

“Yeah. I got something to tell you.” 

* * *

_ It’s the art of compromise. _

* * *

“I’m thinking… Bora Bora.” 

Michelle rolled her eyes, watching Tony as he leaned over on the couch, folding his arms. 

“We’re not going on a babymoon, Tony. Look at me, I’m _ huge. _” Michelle says but Tony just shrugs, dismissing it as Peter laughed. 

“At _ least _ consider it. You and Pete deserve a break. Parenting’s hard work and kids are brats. Right, Morgan?” 

“Whatever, dad.” Morgan yelled out from her room, Michelle leaning further into the couch as Peter continued to massage her feet. Her ankles were swollen, or so he told her - Michelle hadn’t seen them in weeks. 

If she was at anyone else’s house, she would’ve just dealt with it - motivating herself to look forward to the foot massage Peter would give her when they’d finally get home. But since it was the cabin, since Pepper and Tony were like her second family - one of the many she had seemingly inherited when she’d married Peter Parker - she didn’t care. 

Her feet hurt and Peter, God bless him, was going to massage her feet on a couch that wasn’t theirs. 

“Leave them alone, Tony. Save the vacations for later. Michelle needs to _ relax _.” Pepper’s voice rings out from the kitchen even as Michelle sees Tony roll his eyes before winking at her. 

“Yes dear.” 

Tony leans forward towards her, Michelle smiling at the mischievous glint in his eye.

“Tell me now, kid. You sure you want a hospital birth? I got state of the art tech right here, can get Cho and Banner and God knows who else here for you when the kid comes.”

It’s Peter who rolls his eyes this time, Michelle sighing as his thumb worked the center of her foot. Her back had been aching for hours, a pain that ebbed and flowed - never stopping no matter what she tried. 

Pepper was right, she needed to relax - even if it seemed that no matter what she did, she couldn’t get comfortable.

She loved the kid, more than she’s ever loved anyone before - but if he didn’t make his appearance soon, Michelle wasn’t sure what she was going to do. 

“You _ do _ know you’re not the only one invested in this right? Arthur and Julie are going to want to be there, May and Happy already invited us to stay with them for the first few weeks. Face it, Tony,” Peter winks at Michelle before looking back to Tony, “You’re gonna have to come to terms with the fact that you have to share.”

“Me? Share? Pete, I don’t do sharing. Least of all when my kid’s having a kid.” He looks back to Michelle, the pain in her back flaring just then. “Whatever you want, kid. Pete’s secondary at this point, my focus is on you.”

“Hey!” 

Peter and Tony banter back and forth for a minute but the ache in her back was starting to become sharper, Michelle’s breath hitching - causing Peter and Tony to stop.

“You okay, kid?”

“MJ?”

“I don’t--I don’t know.” Michelle tries to sit up, Tony immediately going to help her as Peter’s eyes widen. 

“What’s wrong? What do you need? I don’t--” Peter closes his eyes, Michelle grimacing - knowing he was listening for the baby’s heartbeat. Relief floods his features before he opens his eyes again, still searching Michelle’s face. 

“He’s okay, I don’t hear anything wrong.”

“I don’t think there’s something… _ wrong _.” Michelle winces, Tony’s hands still gently on her shoulders as he helps her up. Pepper’s by her side immediately, Michelle was still not used to being the center of attention for anything - much less how much she’d had to deal with it for the past nine months. 

It was something she had enjoyed when she was younger, watching from the sidelines - observing people and what they did. It wasn’t something she wanted to return to necessarily but now, with six eyes on her looking at her in concern - Michelle just wanted to disappear. 

“I’m fine. I think, I think I just need to pee.”

“Okay, okay, we’ll help you up.”

“I don’t need a damn army to _ pee, _ Peter.” Michelle snaps, even as she allows the three of them to help her sit upright. The pain in her back feels sharp now, groaning as Peter and Pepper both help her up.

She feels the liquid on her feet before she hears it, Pepper gasping as Michelle groans. 

“Sorry Pepper, sorry, I thought I was going to make it. I’ll--”

“MJ. You--you’re--” Peter’s voice is soft, shaky - enough to make Michelle look back to him in confusion. 

“This is embarrassing enough, Peter. Don’t make it weird.” She turns back to Pepper to apologize again, only to see tears in her eyes, Michelle completely bewildered.

“How much did this carpet cost?”

She hears Tony’s laughter behind her before his loud voice starts booming. 

“Forget the carpet, sweetheart. We’re having a baby!”

She turns back to Peter, his own eyes wide as he smiles.

Michelle laughs, pain shooting up her spine.

“Oh shit.” 

* * *

_ It’s hellos and long goodbyes. _

* * *

Michelle’s tired - a deep, bone-chilling exhaustion unlike anything she’s ever felt before. She feels Peter’s hand on her forehead, smiling as he kisses her once more before brushing some hair back. 

“Hi.” 

Peter laughs before smiling. “Hi yourself. How you feeling?” 

Michelle says nothing, looking down at the tiny baby on her chest. 

He was so small, perfect - Michelle’s counted each of his fingers thirty times, marveled at the little pucker of his lips for what felt like hours and she already knows, she’ll never get enough. 

It’s as if the universe had stopped - paused everything, just for them. 

Peter lays his head down to rest against hers, leaning over as they both watched him sleep. 

“Happy.” Michelle finally whispered, Peter kissing her temple before turning back to their son.

They were together - finally, Michelle marveling at the little wonder in her arms, the perfect mix of her and Peter - a literal and physical manifestation of their love, his little chest rising and falling with Michelle’s. 

It was overwhelming, Michelle thinking that she’d thought she’d known love when she had married Peter. But it’s nothing, _ nothing _ compared to what she feels for her son - a love so deep and so full that it’s incomprehensible - a love that’s altered everything. 

“I think his given name is Harold. Not sure if he want to call him that.” Michelle blinks for a few seconds before laughing, the movement from her chest making their son stir. She glares at Peter who can barely hide his grin over his terrible joke. 

“I thought we decided on Benjamin.”

“We did, but MJ I’ve been thinking--”

“We are not _ naming _ our son Han, Peter. It’s not happening.” Michelle whispered, rolling her eyes as Peter made a face. 

“Benjamin Han Parker has a nice ring to it.”

“No.”

“MJ.”

“Peter, I just pushed our son out of my vagina. A son that I refuse to name _ Han _.” Michelle smirks as Peter pursed his lips.

“Fair.” 

* * *

_ It’s the picture of our lives, isn’t it crazy? _

* * *

Michelle can hear the screaming before she even walks in, bracing herself as she opens the door.

She can hear Peter’s frantic voice from the living room, locking the door behind her as she sees him - pacing down the hallway.

“Shhh, shh, it’s okay, it’s okay. Daddy’s here.” Ben doesn’t seem to care in the slightest, screaming so loudly that it makes Michelle wince.

Peter turns to face her, an exhausted and exasperated look on his face. 

“Hey MJ, have a good day?”

Michelle sets her bag down, motioning her arms towards them.

“Let me take him.”

“No, I got him.” Peter says a bit too sharply, Michelle sighing. 

“Peter, how long as he been crying? You’re tired and I had a rough day so please--”

“Exactly, MJ. You’ve been at work _ all day _, just relax. I got this.” Peter says as Ben lets out another wail, Peter trying to soothe him.

Michelle almost thinks to argue but then stops, knowing Peter’s trying to keep his promise to her. 

She’d wanted Ben - more than she had ever wanted anything - but the thought of staying home for too long was something she couldn’t reconcile with herself, the desire to get back to the work that she loved. 

Michelle liked what she did, being a journalist allowed her to channel all her youthful energy and desire to change the world into something real and tangible. She hadn’t expected to feel the slight undercurrent of guilt she got from her co-workers about returning so soon, or even her own guilt that she might be missing time with Ben. 

But having Ben had just motivated her even further, knowing she’d do anything in her power to help make the world a better place. 

It helped that Peter had been preparing to be a stay-at-home dad for years now. Had taken classes, read countless books, reorganized his entire schedule with SI and Spider-Man so that he could be there for Ben. 

And even as he continued to sway, Ben still crying - Michelle could only smile.

She loved him - both of them. No matter how loud or messy it could be. 

Because they were hers. 

* * *

_ So I’ll call you when I get to where I’m going, _

_ And I’ll tell everyone we know that you said hello. _

_ And without fail they’ll ask me if I miss you. _

_ Of course I do. You know I do. _

* * *

“You going to that taco stand for lunch?”

Michelle squints as she listens through the phone, hearing the sound of the wind from Peter’s end. 

“I’m thinking about it.” Michelle responded, thinking it wasn’t quite a lie since she was - in truth - _ thinking _ about it. She didn’t really have any intention of going but she had considered it as she passed by, walking in the opposite direction. 

She’d told herself that he was fine, over and over again - but she still wanted to see it for herself. 

It was something that her mom, May and Pepper had warned her about, something that Michelle had dismissed - saying that she’d gotten used to being away from Ben since she’d been the one to go back to work. 

But despite all the warnings they gave her, despite the quiet and gentle reminders that it was going to be different - Michelle hadn’t realized how right they had been until the day came. 

Ben’s first day of kindergarten wasn’t a milestone she had missed, being right there with Peter as they dropped him off. And even if she knew it was irrational and that Peter would’ve gotten on to her about skipping lunch if he knew - she couldn’t help it. 

Ben was starting school. 

_ Ben was five years old. _

It felt like just a few minutes ago he’d been born. That she’d blinked and he was taking his first steps. 

“What _ else _ are you thinking of?” Peter’s words from the other line bring her out of her thoughts as she walks up to the school, thinking that if she’d timed it right that maybe she could catch a glimpse of him on the playground.

“Uh,” Michelle glances towards the slide, seeing some kids running around as she searched the playground for the messy head of curls that she’d know anywhere, “There’s supposed to be a new vegan place down the street. Carla wanted to try it out.”

She hears Peter’s laugh on the other line. “You think Carla’s gonna be able to hold your place in line if you’re so far away?” 

Michelle tilts her head, glancing at the phone before she sees the familiar shadow pass over her, laughing as she shook her head. 

She sees Peter land on a streetlight, rolling her eyes. 

“What happened to ‘He’ll be okay, MJ. Don’t worry about it’?” 

“That was morning Peter and you already know we don’t trust him. Besides, _ you _ are the one who is supposed to be at work.”

“I’m on lunch, Pete. What’s your excuse? Isn’t there some cat that needs saving?” 

She hears Peter snort through the phone, her eyes going back to the playground. And then she sees him - her heart feeling like it was going to leap out of her chest as she watched Ben, running around and playing with some new friend he had no doubt made in the three hours he’d been at school. 

Ben was the perfect mix of them - inheriting Peter’s mess of curls, his smile and his nose, Michelle seeing herself in his eyes, his chin and his light brown skin. He already had Peter’s sense of humor and her bluntness - a firecracker of a child that made Michelle wonder how the hell they were going to handle him as a teenager.

But seeing him play, smiling as she watched him - Michelle chased away the thought, relishing that even if time couldn’t stop - she didn’t have to rush it forward.

“You see him?” She hears Peter say through the phone. Michelle nods, glancing back up to him. 

“Yeah.” She sees the mask’s eyes shift slightly, wishing that she could see the smile underneath before saying, “Now get out of here before someone sees you.” 

She sees the eye roll even if the mask doesn’t change, Peter laughing through the phone. “And _ you _ should get back to work.”

“I will.” She turns back to look at Ben once more, heart swelling as she watched him laugh.

“Just missed him.” 

* * *

_ Cause I’m in love with you. _

* * *

Michelle rolled over, only to pause - hand feeling around the empty side of the bed. A surge of panic shoots through her, thinking back to the last time Peter hadn’t been there - the threat that had taken him away in the middle of the night, only to wake up the next morning with a dozen missed calls - grabbing Ben and rushing to the compound.

It was a panic that Michelle had felt since the summer before junior year - running up to him on a bridge in London, terrified that she’d lost him. 

Peter had been fine then and the countless times since, but it was a fear that struck the deepest parts of her - the worry that there would be a day when Peter wouldn’t come home. 

She goes for her phone, as her heart starts to pound only to see nothing. But before she can think to call Peter, call anyone - Ben comes rushing through the room, jumping on the bed with Peter not far behind.

“What--”

“Happy anniversary mommy!” Michelle laughs, sitting up as Ben jumps into her arms. The relief is instantaneous, seeing Peter in front of her and Ben in her arms. Her panic had made her forget what the day was, her mind and fears running away from her. She hugs Ben, kissing his forehead as Peter brings in a cup of coffee. 

“Happy anniversary, MJ.” He leans into kiss her, hearing Ben’s squeal. 

“Gross.” 

“Gross? _ Gross? _ Listen here you little booger--” Peter grabs Ben like he weighs nothing, Michelle knowing that to Peter it was like he didn’t, laughing as Peter starts to tickle him.

Ben’s laughter fills the room, Michelle taking a sip of her coffee as she stares at the two of them - Peter catching her eye. 

He winked. Michelle smiled.

Peter was okay.

And so was she. 

* * *

_Oh, I’m in love with you. _

* * *

“I think sixty-eight looks great on you, old man.” 

Tony rolls his eyes, Michelle smirking as Peter nudged him with his shoulder. 

“I’m over the hill. Put out to pasture. Stick a fork in me, I’m done.”

“You’ve been old forever dad, don’t be so dramatic.” Morgan joked, making Peter laugh even as Tony rolled his eyes again. 

“Listen here, Mo just cause you’re in college and think you’re hot shit--”

“Hey, hey, hey” Peter immediately goes to cover Ben’s ears. “Tony, come on.” 

“Peter, he’s _ our _ kid and we live in Queens. You really think he hasn’t heard worse from you when you’ve come back from patrol?” 

Tony laughs as Peter balks, Michelle just shrugging before looking to Ben. “But hey, no swearing in school alright?” 

Ben smiles, a mischievous glint in her eye that sends Michelle back to high school - recognizing that same look from when it was on Peter’s face. 

“No swearing _ in _ school. Got it.” 

Tony laughs. 

“Yeah, he’s your kid alright. All about the technicalities.” 

As Peter and Tony go back and forth, Morgan taking Ben out of the room - Michelle just watches the two of them and shakes her head. 

She loved this family, loved the life she’d created with Peter. 

Life with them was better than what she had ever expected. 

* * *

_ You’re the one I choose. _

* * *

“You ever think what would’ve happened if I hadn’t asked you out?”

Michelle paused, slowly lowering her coffee mug as Peter looked towards the ceiling.

“Hold up, if you didn’t _ what _?”

“Asked you out. I mean, I know it’s been awhile since we dated but come on, give me some credit here.”

Michelle snorted, Peter looking at her in confusion as she her coffee mug down. 

“I’m sorry, I know you hit your head a lot because of your bug gig but walk with me here, you think _ you _ asked me out first?”

Peter sighed, looking back to her as if she was Ben, going to explain something patiently to her. “Clearly, you forgot that I was the one who knocked on your door that night. Remember? Prague? Right after the fire monster shit?”

“Yeah, I remember but last I checked, that wasn’t a _ date _, Peter. We barely walked a few feet from the hotel before--”

“Okay, okay it wasn’t a _ date _date but, it still counts.”

“It’s cute that you think that. Remind me to tell you that next time I try and plan some fancy date night for you.”

“You _ don’t _ plan the fancy date nights, MJ. That’s my job.”

“And you’re so _ good _ at it.” She smiles, winking as Peter laughs. “But let’s be clear, you didn’t ask me out on our actual first date. _ I _ did.” 

“I’m not going to argue with you about this, MJ.” 

“Good. You shouldn’t. I’m right.” 

“Have you always been this stubborn?” Peter asks. 

Michelle winks, going for her coffee mug. “Since the day you met me.”

“Good thing I love you.” Peter mutters, even if Michelle can see the smirk on his face.

“I know.”

“Hey!”

* * *

_ Cause I’m in love. _

_ I’m in love with you. _

_ I’m in love with you. _

* * *

“I love you.”

Michelle smiled, holding his hand. 

It’d been over a year since Europe, a year since her and Peter had started dating - and yet she now felt so comfortable with him, so at ease - that the awkwardness that she’d felt then was like a distant memory.

Being with Peter didn’t twist her stomach into knots, didn’t give her butterflies or whatever else bullshit she’d see on those cheesy romance movies May liked to watch.

Being with him felt more like wearing an old sweatshirt, like sinking into her side of the couch after a long day. 

Comfortable. Quiet. Easy.

“I love you, too.” Peter smiled back, leaning in until their lips met, Michelle closing her eyes. 

It was different than what she had expected, dating in high school - falling in love.

She’d been watching Peter since she was fifteen years old - telling herself and others that she hadn’t been obsessed with him, just observant. 

But she had been - obsessed, fascinated by the boy with secrets that he hadn’t told her until last year, with a purpose and a desire to help the world around him that possibly rivaled her own. 

And as the kiss deepened, Michelle feeling his arms wrap around her as she brought a hand to his face, she knew that she had found something special - something that felt impossible for anyone to ever say at seventeen.

She was in love with Peter Parker. And she knew that Peter - holding her closer, feeling the smile on his lips - was in love with her too. 

* * *

_ I love you just the same, _

_ As I did the day, _

_ I fell in love with you._


End file.
